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  • Writer's pictureMia S

How I Turned Severe Un-Athleticism Into a Black Belt

Today's Holidays: World Nutella Day, National Chocolate Fondue Day, National Weatherman's Day, National Girls and Women in Sports Day, Chinese New Year

Fact of the Day: All of the Nutella sold in a year could spread over more than 1000 soccer fields.

Website of the Day: https://chinesenewyear.net/zodiac/


I’ll admit, sports have never really been my forte.  My mom was a gymnast, so she really wanted me to be one too.  Unfortunately, my brother inherited her flexibility genes, while I got stuck with incoordination and a fear of heights that sent me running into the bathroom crying when the instructors tried to put me upside on the bars at my gymnastics practice.  After my short-lived career in gymnastics, I tried ballet, soccer, softball, basketball, and tennis. My lack of coordination didn’t get me very far in ballet, and I was always a pretty cautious person, afraid to take off my floaties in the pool, go down the slide at the playground, or even attempt the monkey bars.  So when a softball was flying at my head and I stood on the home plate, its safe to say that I never once hit the ball very far, if at all. In soccer, I joke that I “played the bench”, but it’s the absolute truth. With basketball, again, I was afraid of the ball and exceptionally bad at making game-time decisions, so I always got the ball stolen from me.  And how could I forget tennis? My dad bought me an entire set of pink tennis balls, complete with a pink and white tennis racket, excited to teach his daughter how to play the sport, but I, among my other superb athletic abilities, had no strength, whatsoever. I couldn’t hit the ball over the net, even when I used two hands on the racket. Oh, and I should also mention that I hated the outdoors: bees terrified me, the weather was always too hot or too cold, and I wasn’t a fan of grass.  At this point, if it wasn’t already obvious, my parents had deemed my brothers the “athletic” ones.


However, in second grade my family moved from North Brunswick to East Windsor, and East Windsor had a popular taekwondo studio, called East Coast Martial Arts.  My brother, Jake, six years old at the time, begged to join and live out his dream of learning martial arts. And so I, as his older sister, was forced to go with him to the trial class.  If I ran away from the soccer ball when it came towards me, couldn’t ride a bike unless it had training wheels, and basically lived the life of an indoor house cat, how would I last even one class in taekwondo?  Well, six years later I received my black belt.


It turns out taekwondo is much more than simply strength and coordination. We began that trial class, just as I did for all the classes after, by reciting the tenets of taekwondo: courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control, and indomitable spirit.  I didn’t know exactly what those words meant in the moment, but as time went on, I realized that those principles were the reason I connected with taekwondo to such an extent. And when I look back on taekwondo now, I see how it has influenced my life beyond the walls of the martial arts studio:  


Courtesy: Taekwondo demands respect, both for others in the class and especially for your instructor.  Though classes were conducted based on belt levels, everybody learns techniques and works at a different pace, so when we were taught something new or sparred each other (fought each other with gear), we were encouraged to support our fellow classmates with kindness and humility.  If you asked my parents about me as a child, they would probably tell you that I was pretty selfish. I hated sharing, I demanded “blue juice”, which was Hawaiian Blue Punch, because at the time my favorite color was blue (I know, crazy), and I was really mean to Jake when he was first born, because I didn’t like the idea of having to share my parents' attention.  Most of you who know me now most likely find this hard to imagine, and I credit taekwondo as a large influencer in this change in my persona. I learned the importance of compassion and kindness, the value of helping others succeed along with you, and ultimately, what it means to truly support and care for others.


Integrity: When I was in kindergarten, I had a best friend named Jordan.  Jordan wasn’t necessarily the best behaved kid in the class, and he often got me into trouble, but because he was my best friend, I didn’t mind very much.  One day, we were playing this game in class, in which a student stood in front of the class and thought of a number from one to ten, while the rest of the class had to guess the number.  It was Jordan’s turn to think of a number, and I sat in my desk, facing him in the front row. When Jordan thought the teacher wasn’t looking, he whispered me the number: six, so naturally, I raised my hand and answered with “six”.  I’m not sure if Ms. Endler saw Jordan whisper the number or she assumed he helped me due to our closeness, but she asked me, point blank: “Mia, did Jordan tell you the number?”. And in my decisive moment, the one I regret and carry with me to this day, I said: “No”.  Okay, I may be exaggerating a bit, but this memory has always stuck with me, because I am a very honest, moral person, and lying and cheating have never been something I embrace or condone, unlike Jake who, to this day, steals money in Monopoly. My taekwondo days stressed the importance of integrity to such a degree that it has become engraved in me to always do what I think to be the “right” thing.  Of all the principles, taekwondo honored morality and honesty the most, encouraging us to be model citizens and representatives of moral character.


Perseverance: While I explained how I found my place in taekwondo after the disaster that was my years in other sports, this doesn’t mean that my athletic struggles were over.  An integral aspect of taekwondo is being able to break wooden boards, which begins once you reach the upper level belts. Due to my physical weakness, I struggled to do this. I watched Jake, two years younger than me, break two or three boards at once as I could barely crack one.  However, my instructors didn’t give on me, and so I didn’t give up on myself. I still have this theory that they “bended” the board for me as they held it, making it easier to break, but either way, I broke the boards I needed to ultimately earn my black belt. Taekwondo is all about not giving up, and breaking boards was surely not my only challenge or set back in life.  Because of Taekwondo, I have learned how to deal with struggle, how to keep going in the face of adversity, and the value in accomplishing something amidst challenge.


Self-Control: When people think of martial arts, their minds immediately go towards this image of fighting and combat.  That’s how I used to think of it too before I joined. Yet taekwondo actually emphasizes self-control, both in terms of the mind and body.  We were instructed to control our motions: thinking about each one carefully and enacting it precisely, rather than throwing out random and uncontrolled punches and kicks.  This type of control takes careful consideration and extreme focus, which has not only contributed to my academic performance, but has taught me how to also control my emotions.  It is okay to express how we feel: cry when we’re sad, tell someone that we love him/her, or explain to someone why we are disappointed or angry with him/her. However, there is a difference between expressing our emotions and recklessly flaunting them, the latter often leading to a negative impact.  We have a right to feel what we feel, but we must decide, with careful thought, how we want to portray these feelings to the world.


Indomitable Spirit:  We respect others who respect themselves and their beliefs; It is a known truth.  The principles that we claim to follow and the values we claim to believe in carry no weight if we either do not practice them in action or we sacrifice them in favor of a certain outcome.  Taekwondo made me believe in the previous four tenets, and indomitable spirit made me embrace the tenets as a part of my identity. I have formed my own beliefs over the years: the value of hard work over talent, the necessity of love and passion, the impact that writing has on the world, the importance of relationships, earning things on your own merit, and the value in both simplicity and complexity in life.  Because of taekwondo and the emphasis that the instructors put on staying true to our beliefs and practicing them every day, no matter the circumstances, I know what it is to like to fervently believe in something: something that then becomes a part of who you are, and everybody deserves to know this feeling.


After taekwondo, I joined cross country and track and highschool, and though I had no natural speed and agility, I applied what I had learned from taekwondo, and ended up not only succeeding in cross country, but finding a family among my teammates.  And now, at Princeton, I’m a cheerleader, surrounded by inspiring student-athletes and friends that portray these same values of courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control, and indomitable spirit. I am forever grateful for the confidence that taekwondo provided me with at a time in which I needed it most, as well as the set of defining principles that I took with me as a result.


So for everyone who doesn’t think that sports are your “thing”: join anyway.  You never know, you just might find a new passion and family in the process. This really goes for anything in life; Though a cliche, it still best expresses the message: you never know until you try, or you'll miss all the shots you don't take. Interview for a competitive internship. Take the more challenging class. Enter in the competition. Challenge your mind in a new way.   Go outside of your comfort zone. The more I think about life, through my freshman seminar, “What Makes for a Meaningful Life? A Search”, my own experiences, and my writing as well as the writing of others, I’m reminded of all the twists and turns and underground tunnels and bumpy paths and clear waters and secret staircases that compose this very essence that is human life.  There are so many ways to go, and if you just look a little past the one, limiting path that you are on, you’ll begin to see the entire picture of all that is around you. Open your eyes and venture into your surroundings.


While this post may have drifted just the slightest off topic, I’ll bring it back by wishing everyone a happy National Girls and Women in Sports Day: pursue the opportunities you desire and keep your mind open to the opportunities that arise, even if you have to walk a bit off the path to do so.  Yes, I learned so much about myself through taekwondo, but more importantly (not really, but it's funny to mention), now I can always surprise people, given I’m 5’2 and wear fluffy pink earmuffs in the winter, and defend my physical weakness by saying: “Hey! I’m a black belt in taekwondo- you don’t wanna mess with me” (even though I definitely would not be able to fight someone or defend myself- taekwondo can only do so much in that department).  


Happy National Girls and Women in Sports Day! How did you celebrate? Comment below or send in a picture to my new instagram account (@officialoneholiday)! *Disclaimer: this was posted fifty minutes before February 5th, but it's okay! #Celebrate #Sports #BeHappy  

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